Donnerstag, 9. Mai 2013

thoughts on getting married....

My childhood friend, lets call her Lisa, just got married to her "High-School Sweatheart", lets call him Barry.
So, Barry and Lisa have known each other for over 10 years and basically been in a relationship for the same span of time. I had to play matchmaker in 9th grade, they were way too shy to talk to each other and I was way more outgoing than I am now.
In July last year, Barry proposed to Lisa on a rainy evening while vacationing in a tent for 2 weeks somewhere close to where Barry's brother lives nowadays with his girlfriend.
Soo romantic... not. Well, she loved it. I think it's kinda sappy. Imagine, sitting in a two-people tent, being cold because it is raining outside... and then your boyfriend of 10 years says something like "Uhm, you know... I really love you and..." chokes on his tears, becomes overly emotional and shoves a ringbox under your nose. Yay. She loved it.
When she told me on the phone I aaw'ed and ooh'ed at al the right times of course, she's been my friend for over 15 years. I love her. And him. They're a lovely pair. Its just not what I imagined a nice proposal to be. Or a romantic proposal. but well - guess that's just me.
It's all good as long as she loved it, he loved it, they're both happy and the wedding planning can start.

What you need to know is: Lisa is a perfectionist. Which is fine, it's kind of the reason why I like her so much, because she's awesome organizing stuff and scheduling stuff and everything. Which I like to be but am not. At all. But I am good with improvising so nobody ever finds out I'm not organised (because they don't watch long enough or close enough). Anyways.

So they set the date for someday in April '13. Which then, was a lot of time to plan stuff.
I started university in October though, and lots of my time was spent busy with studying, exams and shit.
So we had the dress by November, with the date for the final fitting in February.
From time to time while talking to Lisa on the phone she would tell me "I tried on my dress again today! Still fits!" - like she expected to gain lots of weight suddenly, just because she bought an expensive dress she would have to fit into - even though she held her weight for the last years with no problems.
But hey, she was worried and I thought it was funny as hell.

The wedding was to take place on Saturday, April 27th, which is a nice date I think.
I arrived at Lisa and Barry's place on Friday 26th though, late afternoon, and Lisa said she would be finished with all her last preperations and stuff.... so that would be a good time to arrive.
We stayed up till about 1 am in the morning, crafting little green butterflies, folding big blobs out of paper (which never got used!! Wth Lisa?!) and around 10:30pm she even started ironing her dress "one last time, so it will look especially gorgeous!"

Saturday, 7 am, we had to be at the hairdresser. She totally smushed down my hair onto my head and it looked like I hadn't washed it in forever. Hated her instantly. But hey, I'm just the Maid of honor, don't mind me, I love to look like shit. Lisa's hair was beatiful. So nicely done, I was in awe.
A pretty simple up-do with little white flowers in the back and two strings of perls in the front kind of like an Alice band. Really pretty.

We were finished around 11 am, went to the hotel were the reception and party would be happening and Lisa put a finishing touch to the decoration in the ball room, the little butterflies, "Lisa & Barry"-pralines (I don't know, I can't find the right english word for that kinda sweet. its like a solid chocolate little muffin but not bigger than a quarter around and 6 quarters stacked high. Any word suggestions?) and all the glasses and napkins and stuff. And then I had to usher her into her room and get her into her dress. Which wasn't as hard as the salesperson made it sound. It was done pretty quickly to be honest. Like 10 Minutes.

Then I had to get dressed, which took like 5 minutes. And then my pair of tight ripped. I loved it! (Can you hear the sarcasm drip...?)
So the brother of the groom's girlfriend, who at that time was still in town getting lunch, got a call from the grooms Best (wo)Man (his sister) and she asked her for me to buy some new tights. Such a great day so far. Shitty hair, ripped tights. I was looking forward to the church part.

It was a catholic wedding. Very formal, grumpy priest and lots of standing up. More standing than sitting.
I did not know the catholics all had such sticks up their.. well sorry, I don't mean to offend anyone, I'm just used to different kind of services, I'm protestant. But all in all it was nice. Magnificent. Festive. Many people cried. I didn't. I'm the one with the cramp in her cheeks because she can't stop smiling.

But during the first dance... dear god, I cried like a baby. Suddenly it all just hit me like ton of bricks. Little Lisa. Married. To Barry. Dear God. Dancing to I Wonder Why by Curtis Stigers. Which is not actually a nice song for a wedding! I don't think they actually listened and translated those lyrics before choosing it for their first dance as husband and wife..... I mean, seriously? I wonder why we hold on with tears in our eyes? That really screams happily ever after, doesn't it.

Anyways. The party lasted till 5 am in the morning, the food was great, the people were nice (I didn't know 90% of the people attending) and all in all... I wanna get married, too!

I know my wedding would be completely different  from Lisa's but that doesn't mean her wedding wasn't beautiful. I would just invite less people, make it more intimate and... I don't know...
I never took myself as a girl imagining her own wedding.. never thought about it before Lisa and Barry married.

If anyone ever reads this; How do you imagine your wedding to be like?